This is the blog post that I wish someone had written for me years ago. It’s been a rocky ride with one of my cats, and I now know more about fleas than I ever wanted to. Living in the city with a feline overlord means that you’ll inevitably share your life at some point with fecking fleas. Your cat will pick them up from the other animals that have been in your garden or yard, generously divesting themselves of their parasitic cargo with a nonchalant shake of the body or a scratch of the neck (whether you know about it or not). Last time I took a ropey cat down to the surgery, the vet said she’d never known such an explosion of fleas as we’ve had this past year – including in her own house. I’m still trying to work whether that revelation was a comfort in any way or not.

Fleas aren’t harmless. Their bites, saliva and excrement can cause humans and animals real distress. And try going for an interview and suddenly noticing a flea bouncing on your white shirt sleeve - the answer to the question, ‘Can you give an example of an occasion where you’ve taken decisive action?’ takes on a hideous negative resonance when you’re desperate to flail at your own clothes while simultaneously fighting with yourself to keep still. So at some point we will all, as city cat owners, likely have to face up to the frenetic drudgery of engaging in various degrees of biological-chemical warfare. You can train a cat to do a lot of things, but, unless you shut it in a box, which seems a tad extreme in real life even for theoretical physicists, you can’t train a cat not to get fleas.

I have two cats. And, seemingly, based on the numbers of free-ranging moggies round here, so do lots of people in my neighbourhood. One of my cats, the runt kitten of a female who needed a home (both now spayed), has the misfortune to be prone to Flea Allergy Dermatitis or ‘FAD’. This means that she is allergic to the flea saliva secreted onto and into her skin when the bastard fleas bite. Before we had the condition professionally diagnosed (recommended), we watched the itching drive her nuts and cause her stress.

Cats with uncontrolled FAD will lick and lick at their fur and skin with the their barbed tongues, and sometimes chew and gnaw crazily at their skin, often on their neck, flanks and around their rump, up to the point of infections setting in. It’s unfair on the cat. It also means regular, hefty vet bills unless it can be controlled.

I can’t stress this enough: do get your cat to a vet a.s.a.p. if this happens – your cat could need steroid tablets or a steroid jab to break the cycle of unbearable itching and over-grooming, and probably an antiobiotic jab if infection has set in. Yes, this can be relatively expensive (my last bill was £87); but it needs to be done – and the sooner the better.

Obviously the best plan is to prevent this happening in the first place. It’ll save your cat from a lot of distress; and it’ll save you money. Here are some ideas to prevent problems, and to nip them in the bud if they start to develop. (But never scrimp on your overlord’s welfare, ok? They’ll get you in the end …)

Prioritise flea control

This applies as much to your home as it does to your cat, given it’s estimated up to 90% of the fleas in your home are not actually on your cat(s). They’re under your feet and within arm’s reach - so try to keep carpets, soft furnishings (sofas and chairs), rugs, throws and pet bedding washed, sprayed, vacuumed, and sprayed again. (Be aware that the vibration of the vacuum can hatch eggs. Nice. Hence the advice to vacuum and then spray again.) And by the way, if your inner slattern or eco-credentials can’t cope with all this – don’t get a cat is the best advice I can give. (And see below: Diet.)

You don’t even need fancy, expensive (i.e. rip-off) ‘flea sprays’, many of which retail at a hefty £7 - £15. A 99p can of fly & wasp spray from somewhere like Savers contains the chemicals needed – Permethrin and Tetramethrin - to break the cycle of eggs-larvae-adult-breeding-eggs. In fact the Savers can of insect spray is stronger in Tetramethrin (which disables the nervous system of insects) than some of the branded, expensive ‘home flea sprays’ from the big name pet-care companies. If you can’t or won’t use pesticidal sprays, consider a non-pesticide one – they do exist and act in a way that ‘glues’ the fleas and stops them breeding and stops the eggs hatching. And keep vacuuming them up … and empty the vacuum into a sealed bag in an outside bin.

Comb your cat regularly. I comb FAD-Cat daily because (a) she loves it; (b) I can detect the presence of fleas quickly; and (c) a cheap fine-toothed nit comb can actually remove the fleas. (Make sure you catch them in a tissue and flush them away immediately. The feckers will jump everywhere.) FAD-Cat and her mum also need regular ‘spot on’ treatments. Your vet can prescribe Advocate, or you can buy Frontline or Advantage at pharmacies and some pet shops. Some of thee work better than others in different geographical regions, depending on the evolved immunity of flea populations.

FAD-Cat has Advocate spot-on every four weeks and we also sometimes rub some non-pesticidal flea spray into the base of her tail and into her back legs at the thigh creases. I also treat the other cat in the house with spot-on flea treatments for the sake of ‘herd immunity’ – and I wish everyone in the city would do the same. (It’s a bit like that pain-in-the-ass saga parents have with primary school age children and head lice.)

Buy a cone

FAD-Cat has her own ‘cone of shame’ to stop her licking off any flea treatments or medications applied to her flanks and tail base, and we also use it when it seems like she’s been over-licking herself prior to either (a) getting to the next stage of home treatment, or (b) taking her to a booked vet appointment.

She tolerates her cone really well, and can eat and drink with it on (using flat plates, not a bowl) and she can also use her litter tray.

I wash the cone regularly, rinse it, and air dry. Those flea eggs and flea saliva can get everywhere, even though you can’t see them.

Wash that flea saliva off your cat

The first step in doing this is to put a long sleeve shirt on and do up the buttons. Falconry gauntlets may be advisable when dealing with a cat on the more violent end of the resistance scale. Luckily my FAD-Cat is getting on a bit in years (she’s 14) and isn’t too vicious. I still prefer a second person being around to help, but have done it on my own. Have towels ready - one the floor and at least one to (attempt to) dry the cat.

I fill the kitchen sink with lukewarm water to about an inch high, and add a capful of ‘soothing’ Dead Sea salts, maybe a squirt of some fragrance-free baby shampoo (the sort that’s for sensitive skin - I use a supermarket own brand so it’s pretty cheap), along with a couple of capfuls of Hibiscrub or a similar preparation that’s non-toxic to cats if they manage to lick it. Products containing either liquid Providone-Iodine or Chlorhexidrine (all available online), but not containing Phenol, are generally recommended. Don’t use TCP or similar – if your cat licks this, they could get sick.

Using a clean cloth, and holding the cat firmly but gently by its scruff, with its back feet and rump in the sink, I gently wash the cat’s back end – from the rump down to the tail, on top and underneath, and any other affected areas.

Use a calm voice throughout the procedure. Human panic is futile. I adopt a particularly ridiculous sing-song voice for this stage of FAD-Cat’s displeasure, which I suspect is more for the benefit of my own anxiety than hers. Rinse your cat off if possible (you could have a jug of lukewarm water standing by) and then wrap your cat in a towel for a cuddle / massive fight. Dry your cat gently and apply the cone. Put the cat in a warm place, and it’s good to end a stressful experience with treat food and a nice voice. They’ll get the hang of it, even if they don’t necessarily always show their appreciation for your valiant efforts.

Add evening primrose oil to your cat’s diet

This was a tip from a vet a few months ago to improve the overall condition of FAD-Cat’s skin, as it had generally become a bit ‘scurfy’ around her lower back.

I bought a bottle of evening primrose oil from a local health food shop (you can buy it cheaper online), and a cheap dropper. A drop a day on food has really improved the condition of FAD-Cat’s skin and fur. This is combined with …

Brush and comb

My feline overlords like being brushed and combed, and it’s lovely to be able to bond with them like this.

I use either a rubber brush or a brush with little bobbles on the end (both recommended for cats), and also gently comb with a flea / nit comb around the neck and rump area.

It’s also a good way of relaxing them and helping them to … (drum roll) …

Avoid stress

FAD-Cat’s condition, especially how it affects her skin, is definitely made worth by stress. A new cat in the neighbourhood, fireworks, new neighbours talking, dogs barking – it all affects her. She can be completely flea-free and yet revert to over-licking behaviour because of the fireworks that are blasting outside from the end of October onwards.

Some cat owners like to use Feliway spray (and you can buy a plug-in version) - it’s sold in pet stores and online.

My cat is very much helped by Zylkene. This, and other cat-soothing remedies, are available online or from your vet. I prefer Zylkene - it seems to work and it comes in a daily capsule which can be pulled apart and the powder inside sprinkled onto cat food - my cat isn’t at all bothered about the taste. It’s a great short-term solution to temporary stresses like fireworks or just going to the vet. Zylkene has been called ‘valium for cats’ but is actually based on a milk protein that cats can tolerate, so it’s not strictly speaking a medication – more of a natural(ish) remedy. I find it worth the money - approx 42 pence a tablet when ordered online.

A cheaper alternative, sold at stores such as Aldi, which may or may not work for your cat, is Valerian. It can be bought as a food additive or as a spot-on such as this one. (It’s not the same plant as catnip; and is claimed to have a mild sedative effect on cats.)

If you use any supposed ‘sedatives’ on cats, keep an eye on them and don’t let them outside. They can be vulnerable.

Diet

The production of cat food is a multi-billion pound industry. Most cat food is pretty similar, and a lot of it is a rip-off, so look at the packs to compare prices versus ingredients, and within reason buy what you can afford that has a good range of minerals, vitamins and Omega oils for the benefit of your cat’s skin and general health. A variety of dry food and wet food is generally recommended - and always have water available.

Do include actual oily fish sometimes if at all possible. Sardines, for example, aren’t too expensive and my cats will eat them mashed up with some dry cat food. I use tuna occasionally, especially to disguise any crushed up medicines.

Don’t ever give cow’s milk to cats. In fact don’t give any ‘milk’ that isn’t lactose-free – their guts can’t tolerate it. The fall-out’s on you - often literally. Use ‘cat milk’ or lactose-free – although water is always best. Cats also like lightly scrambled eggs, to which a little water can be added. Catnip is cheap, as a tasty and happy add-on. Also, you can grow your own cat grass in a garden pot or on a shelf.

Clipping claws

I’m not personally a fan of the practice. Most cats take care of their own claws on scratch posts and fence posts. But, if your cat’s claws are growing too long and they are clawing at and damaging themselves, then your local vet practice or professional grooming parlour will clip them. If you really, really know what you’re doing, then you can buy the correct equipment and do it yourself. The idea is to gently clip off the sharp tip - and no more. Don’t go anywhere near the ‘quick’ of the claw where the pink blood vessels are. Less is more. There are plenty of online guides and tutorials about doing this correctly.

Emergency situations & other vet suggestions

OK, this section is for a kind of Zombie Apocalypse/Brexit/Day After Tomorrow/Manx Winter situation type thing, where you can’t leave the house, there’s no stuff in the shops, and the banking system has collapsed, and you’re rifling around in the first aid box for ideas.

(I’d very much check with your vet prior to an emergency actually arising whether these suggestions would be suitable for your cat, especially if it’s under 4 kg.)

These tips have both been recommended to me by vets in the UK (Portsmouth and Havant), during consultations for FAD-Cat.

Tip 1: A few tiny grains of soluble aspirin in cat food, very occasionally. (If you want to kill your cat in a horrible way, ignore the ‘few grains, very occasionally’ part of that.) Be very careful with aspirin. Aspirin is an effective anti-inflammatory - it’s also pretty powerful. My vet’s advice is only a few grains, definitely never more than a 16th of a regular tablet, and only at most once or twice a week – cats can’t easily metabolise it, and need time (48 hours) to do so even for very small amounts.

Safe doses of aspirin - and the risks - for cats are discussed on a number of online sites, such as here. Don’t give aspirin to a cat with any issues with its internal organs, such as kidney problems - always consult a vet.

Never give a cat paracetamol - it’s fatal.

Tip 2: Some vets suggest Piriton anti-histamine to relieve flea allergy itching in cats - but again, only a very small amount. As with the use of aspirin, caution needs to be exercised, similarly because cats have tiny livers that work in their own special, and often limited, way. It’s also very important that you know that Piriton is not the same as Piriteze - they are different drugs.

It’s essential after giving a cat an antihistamine that you keep it inside in a place of safety, as it is likely to become drowsy and could get into trouble outdoors. As pointed out above, drowsy cat is a very vulnerable cat, particularly around traffic and other animals.

Safe doses of Piriton, Piriteze and even Benadryl for cats are also discussed on a number of online sites, such as here. I only use Piriton, and far less than Dr Michael discusses, and only when absolutely necessary.

Tip 3: Apply a very thin film of Hydrocortisone 1% to your cat’s affected skin. It’s around £4 a tube in a pharmacy, if they’ll sell it to you. Or you can buy it - yes, you’ve guessed it - online. It’s an effective short-term treatment for bites and dermatitis.

Always check with a vet. If the skin is badly damaged, or infected, you need a vet.

They do say in the archaeological world that in the settlements and camps of the Stone Age, humans domesticated dogs, but cats domesticated themselves. Urban cats in the modern age however are very dependent on their owners. We really do need to help our feline overlords – and ourselves – with their parasites.

They’re too cute, and too terrifying, not to.